Lies and Other Drugs (Lies Trilogy Book 1) Read online

  I needed a nap and had a list of things I wanted to look into before attending another party tonight. My plan was in motion, and now that they knew I was here, there was no time to waste. But before I could allow myself to sleep, I had one last thing to do.

  Unlocking my phone, I clicked on the last voicemail my brother ever sent me. It was the one piece of evidence I had that Youngblood murdered him. And no matter how many times I listened to it, his voice always shocked me. I missed my brother. It didn’t matter that I’d constructed a strong backbone to deal with all of this; whenever the voicemail played, I cried.

  “Hey, Tav,” his voice was deeper than usual but still purely his. I swiped away a stray tear while smiling at his nickname for me. He was the only one that ever called me Tav. Mom hated it. She said it made us sound cheap. I never understood why sounding cheap was a bad thing.

  “Damn, I miss you, sis. I should’ve never let Liam talk me into coming here. I should be somewhere on the beach with you, not at this fucked up university.”

  I squeezed my eyes shut, imagining what our life would’ve been like had he followed me elsewhere. We’d probably be sitting on the beach somewhere, looking at the waves and ignoring our mother’s calls. We’d never been separated before, but after high school, we found ourselves on completely opposite sides of the country. Bad things always happened when we were away from one another. Like in third grade when he missed the bus and got beat up.

  William let out a slow sigh before continuing, “I know you’re probably preparing for your gallery showing, but I just needed to talk to you. There’s been a lot of shit I haven’t told you about, and I don’t know what to do. There’s this guy, Youngblood...Na-Nathaniel Youngblood…” William’s voice was shaky as he said Nathaniel’s name, as if he were too scared or too sad to speak it out loud. “He is…I need to stay away from him, but it’s fucking impossible. He’s everywhere.”

  A voice in the background called William over, and he answered them. “I gotta go. But I need you, Tav. Maybe I can come visit next weekend? Right now, I feel like if I don’t get away from him, I’ll die. Love you. Hope you’re kicking ass out there.”

  My tears felt like anvils now. They always did when he ended the recording. It was never enough. I needed more from William. “Love you, too,” I whispered before tossing the phone on my bed and crying.

  Chapter 4

  Networking events were crucial for students at Blackwood University. What use was power and money if you couldn’t rub it in other people’s faces? It was like one gigantic orgy. They got off on comparing wallet sizes then used their checkbooks to wipe the cum from their stomachs.

  Tonight’s event was a charity fundraiser hosted by the Pike house. You could tell a lot about a person by how they organized a charity. Modest affairs usually had the best intentions. The bigger the event, the more fake it was. You could practically smell the arrogance in the air. Tonight was a kissing auction. In a couple of hours, Pike members would stand on stage while women bid for kisses. They acted like eligible bachelors, worthy of every dime, and winners got to claim their prize in a drunken display of swapping spit and cheers.

  My brother told me about it our freshmen year. Apparently, the woman that won a kiss from him reeked of garlic and whiskey. She was sloppy and horny and tried undressing him on stage. I distinctly remember him saying that it was one of the most humiliating moments of his life. I wanted to march here and give everyone a piece of my mind, but he insisted that I didn’t say or do anything. He’d always hated how I fought his battles for him. I bet if he could see me now, he’d finally follow through on his threat to disown me.

  I was wearing a long evening gown I’d found in the back of Mrs. Mulberry's closet. It was all black and all elegant. The vintage number had a modest neckline, but it revealed my back, dipping so low that I almost looked naked from behind. My favorite part was the slit up the thigh, and if I’d cared about dating or men, I’d feel sexy tonight. There was a time that I would have swayed my hips as I walked. Maybe even find a hot guy to walk me home and fuck me senseless. But I wasn’t really on the market. Even if it was a one night stand, I didn’t need the distraction.

  I was standing alone in the banquet hall with my arms crossed over my chest. I took in the scenery, wondering what my brother thought when he’d first arrived here three years ago. He would have loved the stage. It was beautiful, perfect for throwing parties. William had always loved pretty things. Probably because he was pretty. He once told me that he was thankful he had a twin because it made the narcissism socially acceptable. Whenever William was feeling handsome, he’d just compliment me. I guess we were taught from a young age that people frowned upon loving yourself.

  The music wasn’t loud, which made it easy to listen in on what people were saying. I was scouting out secrets, observing everyone and doing my best to blend in. In thirty minutes, I’d learned of two girls claiming to have fucked Youngblood last night. They were lying. If I hadn’t been hell-bent on destroying the asshole, I might’ve felt sorry for him. No one deserved to be a prized fuck.

  “So are you going to start showing up to every event I’m at?” Youngblood asked to my left. I took a small moment to settle myself and sip the fruity non-alcoholic punch in my hand before turning to face him.

  “Maybe. Why? Can’t handle seeing me?” I asked with a scowl. Nathaniel looked me up and down as if internalizing my question and trying to think of a way to answer. I never trusted people that had to think about what they were going to say before saying it. The world would be a lot more honest if people just spit out what they were thinking when they were thinking it.

  “I don’t mind looking at you, if that’s what you're asking. Now that you’re not wearing that spy-getup, I see that you actually look nothing like William.” I felt his eyes linger on my chest, and a flush filled my cheeks. He was using his stupid sexy voice to fluster me. I wondered if he was used to leaning on his attractiveness to get what he wanted. I kept my breathing even while scratching my arm. “You have the same eyes though,” he added in a husky whisper. “Light brown with golden specks.”

  I took another sip of my drink, and Youngblood grabbed the cup from me, mimicking my move from last night. He positioned his lips exactly where my red lipstick stain was and took a drink. This was a dance of power. He could try to intimidate and distract me, but he wouldn’t win. You can’t intimidate a fearless person.

  “Your brother hated this charity event,” Nathaniel said in a softer tone. “If I’m being honest, I hate it, too. We’re supposed to smile big for the camera while letting a girl use us.”

  That surprised me. “You’re telling me that you don’t like having your gigantic ego stroked while women literally fight over you?” I asked in disbelief. Nathaniel seemed like the type to get off on that sort of thing.

  “I’m saying that the person I want to kiss isn’t here, and that the idea of kissing someone else is nauseating.” Youngblood adjusted his cufflink with a scattered frown. I swallowed, mentally calculating how much money I still had left over from Liam that I hadn’t touched. If it made him sick, then I’d be damn sure to bid. It wasn’t my initial reason for coming here, but it sure as hell was now.

  “Why even host this? Your daddy’s in oil. Could probably write a check easily enough and be done with it,” I said. The Youngbloods were filthy rich and owned most of the offshore oil rigs. They were in the business of power—literally. The lights in this ballroom were on because of the energy they owned. The bus I took here was fueled by their gas. Hell, even the vibrator Mrs. Mulberry used was powered by one of the many energy companies the Youngbloods owned.

  “People like an opportunity to look charitable,” he replied with a frown. “You gonna tell me why you’re here?” he asked, changing the subject. I took a moment to take in his tailored suit, dark eyes, and deep-set frown.

  “You already know.”

  “Actually, no, I don’t. William told me you were big in the art scene. He sa
id you’d be a famous painter one day.”

  Tears started to well up in my eyes as he spoke, and I got annoyed with myself for letting him see me flustered. William always supported my dreams. Even on the days I doubted myself, he never did. “You don’t have to be here, Tav,” he whispered, and I flinched at William’s special nickname for me.

  “I bet you’d like that.” I spotted Samuel on the other side of the room, chatting up a woman with black hair down to her waist. I used him as my focal point, taking in every detail of his suit and tousled hair until thoughts of my brother left my brain. Noah called it an “avoidance tactic,” I called it survival.

  “At first, I thought you were nothing but trouble. But I could actually like having you around. I’d hoped to meet you one day. Just...not like this.”

  Nothing about my meeting with Nathaniel was going as planned. I’d always assumed he was a bully or someone caught up with the elitist mindset of the university. He seemed to know too much about William and me to be a casual observer. “How did you and William know each other?” I asked.

  All the softness from his expression disappeared from his face as he stared across the room. “I knew him about as much as everyone else did. We were in the same frat,” was his blunt response. He could try to fool me all he wanted, but I was smarter than I looked. William meant something to Nathaniel. Even if it was just a quiet sense of responsibility. “Look, what happened is a tragedy, and if you need to be here to work through whatever fucked up grief you have, then fine. But don’t think it’ll make any difference. William is dead.”

  Nathaniel stormed off as the announcer took the stage, and I took a moment to compose myself. I was the one meant to throw him off his game, not the other way around. I waited as the crowd settled. The emcee of the night was a younger guy wearing the Pike letters proudly on his coat pocket. Like the rest of them, he seemed eager to be the center of attention.

  “As you all know, we’ve decided to change the beneficiary for our charity. A year ago, one of our own was struggling with substance abuse and passed away in the Pike house.”

  The announcer paused then gestured behind him for dramatic effect. A white curtain was pulled to the side, revealing a large screen with a photo of my brother. I shut my eyes, unwilling to see him like that. I knew the picture well. It was the one shared on all the news stations. It was framed at his memorial service, and Liam even went so far as to have it put on his gravestone, forever immortalized as a member of Pike. His eyes were vacant in that photo. His hair trimmed a little shorter than I’d liked. My brother’s lips were twisted into a forced smile as he wore those fancy Greek letters on his red and black jacket.

  If I had any choice, I would have picked the photo of him I snapped the day before he left for college. We went to the lake to spend the day together. We gossiped, reminisced, and promised to one day be neighbors so our kids could run around and have a similar relationship. I managed to snap a photo of him sitting at the docks, sticking his toes in the water.

  The announcer kept speaking, making my blood boil with anger. “This year, we’ve decided to start the William Wilson Memorial Fund. Every penny raised tonight will go towards substance abuse prevention programs in his honor. We know that William loved this auction, and are pleased to be able to use this to memorialize him at Blackwood University.”

  I scoffed. He hated these auctions. He hated this school. I shuddered at the thought of them using his name to boost their own egos.

  Music started playing, and a procession of men wearing black and red jackets filtered on stage. I scanned them, noting where Samuel was. He looked proud standing between his frat brothers, happy to be up there. Nathaniel stood beside him, averting his gaze from the crowd but smiling politely. Even though I didn't know him well, I knew that it wasn't a genuine expression. His stiff back, slumped shoulders, and shifty eyes hinted that he was wildly uncomfortable in the center of attention.

  It was almost like Samuel was purposefully trying to garner the attention of everyone to hide Nathaniel behind his personality. I caught small, genuine smiles of reassurance between them that only someone knowing to look for it would notice.

  Around me, women filtered towards the stage, feasting their eyes upon the men like they were God’s treat just for them. The auction started with recruits, and it was a joke to see how low the bidding could start off at. A particularly lanky freshman—probably a legacy—stood there for ten minutes while two women bid pennies for him. I felt sorry but didn't want to bid either. I was saving all my money for the grand finale.

  Gradually, the bids became higher. When Samuel stood on stage, his eyes connected with mine, and he threw me an apologetic smirk. I thought back to our meeting earlier today and shrugged. Samuel represented the institution that covered up my brother's death, but I didn't think he was a bad guy. I just didn't have time for flirty smiles and eyes that seemed to look deep into my soul. If I were to let him in, tear back my layers, he wouldn’t like what he found. I only trusted alcoholics and the elderly with my secrets.

  About ten girls bid for him, starting with a hundred dollars and quickly working their way up. I bit my lip when they went into the thousands. These were girls who had their father's credit card and an excuse to spend money. The bidding topped out at four thousand dollars, and I watched in shock as the girl went up there to claim her kiss. One kiss and bragging rights for four thousand dollars, what a steal.

  She was pretty. Bright blue eyes and long blond hair. She was curvy in all the right places, but Samuel still seemed just as politely interested in her as he was in this party. He played his part well. Very aware of all the eyes on him. The moment the bell rang, indicating that it was time to start, he wrapped his arms around her and devoured her whole. He threaded his hands in her long blond hair, and I blushed at the moans coming from her mouth.

  The crowd cheered when their time was up, but Samuel made sure to linger as long as possible before pulling away. She had wobbly steps, so he guided her off the stage and back into the crowd. And as he walked by me, he gave me a wink and brushed his fingers against mine.

  You could tell who was more important based on the excitement of the crowd. And when Nathaniel stood in the center of the stage, it was as if the importance of the evening hit a crescendo. Every woman in that ballroom was at full attention, staring at him. This was about to be a bloodbath.

  The moment the announcer started the bidding, three women spoke at once. Each of them for different amounts, the highest being eight hundred. I watched Nathaniel for his reaction, and my lip lifted in satisfaction when I noticed his eye twitch in discomfort. The bidding quickly moved to the thousands, barely passing the five thousand mark before I decided to enter. "Eight thousand!” I yelled.

  Nathaniel tilted his head to the side, and more women stepped up with their bids. I felt his gaze lock on mine, his gaze full of curiosity and heat.

  "Nine thousand!" I yelled, keeping in line with everyone else. Around me, the room started to go quiet as people realized who was bidding. I held my smile firmly in place, unwilling to give in to the gossip that was filtering in around me.

  "That's William’s sister," someone whispered from behind.

  There was a particularly persistent woman in the front. She was older than the rest. With dark blond hair and wrinkles hidden beneath plastic surgery, she scowled every time I bid. I wondered who she was and why she was bidding on him.

  When she yelled ten thousand, the entire room erupted in applause, but I wasn't through yet. I'd been needing an excuse to drain my account of the rest of Liam Carlisle's money. I wanted nothing attaching myself to the man that sent my brother away to his death, so what better use than a bullshit charity honoring my brother's memory at the school he despised?

  "Twenty thousand!" I yelled. A hush went over the crowd, and everyone stared at me as I walked toward the stage. I knew that the woman was done by the way her arms crossed over her chest as her face slumped into a deep scowl. Bidding any more wo
uld look desperate. Even though most of these women wouldn’t blink at the price tag, there was a certain balance to this sort of charity. You couldn’t look too eager or you’d risk looking pathetic. Her eyes were like daggers on my skin, but I didn't pay her any attention. I only had one purpose for this evening, and it was to make Nathaniel as uncomfortable as possible. He'd already shown that he had the tendency to feel guilt, and I knew that he hated this auction as much as my brother did.

  All you could hear were my heels on the wooden steps leading up to the stage, and the auctioneer gave me a strange look as I walked up to the mic. None of the other girls had given a speech, but I was feeling emboldened. William was my brother, after all. And if they were going to throw an entire party in his honor, then why not let his twin sister give a few words?

  "Thank you all for being here tonight," I said. My voice was poised, but there was an edge in my tone that I hoped resonated with the crowd. I forced a smile, glaring at everyone while I paused between statements.

  "My brother once told me that he hated these auctions. He said it made him feel cheap. I think he wanted to belong more than he wanted to do what was right. So thank you for taking something he hated and turning it into a memorial fund in his name. I'm sure somewhere out there, he's rolling his eyes at all of you. I know I am."

  Again, no one spoke. The crowd was too shocked at my words and confused by my presence. A few whispers started to erupt through the crowd, but it wasn't polite to put down a grieving woman. No one wanted to be the first to cry out that I was wrong. I had grief and insanity on my side. People didn’t want to be rude. They cared too much about looking bad to shame me publicly, and I was using that to my advantage. They would do all their talking in whispers.

  Spinning around, I gave Nathaniel a daring glare. Time seemed to slow as I made my way towards him. He gave me one of those cocky smiles that suggested he didn't think I was willing to follow through on my promise, but it was a practiced move, one that suggested he felt like he was supposed to dare me—supposed to act unaffected. Some might find that bizarre. I found him attractive, yes, but my motives ran much deeper than that. I knew that there were whispers about the cause of my brother's death, and what better way to bring those whispers into a flaming inferno of truth than by kissing Nathaniel on the lips in front of everyone? Blackwood University might have wanted to sweep my brother’s death under the rug, but I wanted to bring the rumors to life. Make his death interesting enough to gossip about.