Soul of the Elite_A Walker Series Novella Read online

  “Hux. It’s bad. All she does is moan Kemper’s name in her sleep.”

  At that, Hux let out a short burst of laughter, before closing off his expression again. It was like talking to a rock. A big, scary, intimidating rock.

  “I’ve got to get out of here—and soon,” I told him.

  Huxley stood, walking over to the sink to get himself a cup of water, then returned to sit back down next to me. “You and I both know you won’t be back in the manor anytime soon.” He took a sip of his drink, then swiped his finger on a stray dollop of chocolate frosting on the wooden table and plopped it in his mouth.

  “I haven’t been welcome in the manor since my parents died,” I said. I frowned at the memories that flashed through my mind. Cyler and Maverick’s grief. The relieved looks on their faces when they told me they were sending me off to school. The lonely holidays, birthdays, and lack of visits.

  A long and uncomfortable silence stretched between us. Although I didn’t expect him to say anything, sometimes I craved comfort or, at the very least, understanding. I wanted to know that someone else saw the injustice in all this.

  “I don’t want to talk about our feelings and shit. Ok? I just wanted some fucking cake,” Huxley began before taking another bite. He chewed slowly and rolled his eyes in exasperation. “But…fuck, I can’t believe I’m saying this… did you ever apologize, I mean really apologize? Not that bullshit ‘oopsie-daisy’ shit you pulled as a kid either. A real, honest, apology?”

  For a brief moment, I gaped at him.

  “Of course I did!” I replied once the shock of him putting more than two words together wore off.

  “Are you sure? Because you never apologized to me.” I shivered as hot coals gathered in the pit of my stomach. Guilt was an emotion I rarely felt, but when I did, it was all-consuming. Huxley had always been the emotionless one in their group. Oh, how I wished to approach a situation with level-headedness. He was direct. Fearless. Hux buried his grudges deep, so asking for an apology meant that this was big—monumental almost.

  “Hux—I—I,” I stuttered. I felt unsure of what to say. Out of all of them, he was the last person I expected to have this conversation with. He stared off into the distance for a moment, and I wondered if our conversation was over.

  “I don’t blame you, Jules.” He took another long gulp of water before continuing. The pause felt like holding my breath. My feelings felt trapped beneath my ribcage. “At that moment, it wasn’t you and Jacob. It was my mom and that Eastern Scavenger.” Huxley’s expression slipped into a dark frown full of pain, guilt, and regrets. His eyes seemed far away, stuck in his mind's eye and reliving the horror he saw that day. My heart broke for him, but I masked my pity into a look of annoyance.

  “Stop blaming yourself, Hux. You’re gonna fuck up your entire life if you go through each experience looking for a reason to punish yourself. God, you’re so helpless and predictable.”

  Huxley didn’t smile, but I saw the slight rise in his brow, and I knew that he was no longer trapped in that night. I wanted to feel pity for him, to hug him, to say I’m sorry for what happened to him. But at the end of the day, Huxley needed someone to kick his ass. We’d never get to a good place if I showed him compassion. He wasn’t that kind of guy.

  “Thanks for the cake,” he said before stealing another bite. He looked at me again, but this time his expression didn’t burn with the pain of what happened.

  "Yeah, do me a favor, Hux. Don't tell anyone I'm eating this."

  "Your pettiness never ceases to amaze me, Jules," he replied with a huff before walking out of the room.

  I knew he’d never offer me verbal confirmation of my forgiveness. Yet as he left the kitchen, it felt as though he took a chunk of my guilt with him.

  Chapter Four

  I hate the Gardens and the unbearable heat. It felt impossible to keep my hair in place while whacking the wheat. The soundtrack to my work was Walker women gossiping about what miner was courting who. The pathetic musings made for a long, boring day.

  My work seemed to drag as I thought about my night in the Scavenger camp. For reasons I wasn't ready to admit yet, I felt excited to see Gordon again. Perhaps it was because we were so equally cynical.

  Sometime during the day, Maverick stopped by to ask about Gordon. I hated to admit it, but when he ruffled my hair and thanked me like a puppy, my metaphorical tail wagged. Even though I shoved his hand away and scowled, I was glad to have impressed him. Hopefully, I'd be out of the Gardens soon. My ultimate goal for tutoring the Scavengers was to better my relationships with my brothers, but that didn’t mean I had to make it easy on them.

  This time, Becca didn’t offer to help, which was most likely Maverick's doing, but I didn’t mind. I had grown tired of entertaining a conversation with her. Becca obsessed over Kemper, and I didn’t have the patience—or level of empathy—to listen to her pining. Any proper self-respecting woman knew when to throw in the towel. Becca’s obsessive comments about Kemper made my mind drift to Jacob and his flirty smile before I shut those thoughts down. He wasn't mine and never would be.

  Unsurprisingly, I was the last to finish my work. By the time I was done, I was so drenched in sweat that my thin grey dress clung to me. I felt the ache of hard work deep in my muscles as I trudged back towards the Walker Dorms to return my tools. I walked alone, the other women were already far ahead of me.

  Once there, I found Tallis speaking with Kemper outside the dorms.

  “Ah, there she is,” Tallis exclaimed with a wide, sharp-toothed grin. Kemper looked curiously at us as if he couldn’t figure out the nature of our relationship. His calculating gaze swept over Tallis’ smile as he leaned against the exterior wall of the dorms. “I’m here to walk Jules to our camp.”

  “Oh?” Kemper asked while raising his eyebrow. He seemed more surprised than suspicious, which was a new look from him. Since moving here, Kemper was unofficially assigned as my babysitter. I've become used to his disapproving frown following my every move.

  “Are you done with your work, Agapimenos?” Tallis asked in that familiar assuming tone which grated my nerves. Kemper’s eyes widened at the familiar nickname, and I swallowed down my frustration. If I wanted to get out of the Gardens, I had to at least try to play the part.

  “It's Jules, Tallis. Not this Agapi-whatever. And yes, just finished up.” I wiped my sweaty hands on my dress before turning to address Kemper. Who, by the way, didn’t have the decency to at least try and hide that he was openly gaping at us.

  “Close your mouth, Kemp. Are you trying to catch bugs?” I asked while squinting my eyes.

  Kemper turned a deep shade of red before frowning in annoyance. When we were kids, he lost a bet and I made him eat crickets— a secret he made me swear to take to the grave. When I felt particularly bratty, I liked to find coy ways of teasing him with it.

  “I agreed to tutor some of the kids in the Scavenger camp,” I explained with a huff and a wave of my hand. I didn't want him making a big deal of it.

  “Wow,” Kemper replied. He crossed his arms over his chest and pushed off of the building so that he was now standing straight. I waited for the inevitable insult about how I wasn’t qualified. Or how I had ulterior motives, but it never came. “That's actually, pretty cool of you. Do you need any supplies?”

  I warmed at that. It was a glow that filled me from within. I noticed Tallis smiling at my reaction to Kemper’s compliment, causing me to lock down the hope that filled me.

  “It’s nothing. If we’re going to let these Scavengers in Dormas, we might as well teach them manners and arithmetic.” I scowled while giving him my signature unamused side-eye.

  Kemper deflated. Two steps forward, twelve steps back. Just how I liked it. “Whatever. Behave. I’m sure Tallis here won’t put up with your brattiness. Maybe this will be good for you,” Kemper said, ending the conversation. With tight eyes and a rigid frame, he stalked towards a group of Walkers complaining about tonight's dinner. Afte
r a moment of deliberation, I called after him.

  “Kemper?” I asked. He looked over his shoulder with an angry look on his face, and I almost felt bad for pushing his buttons. “Could you find my mom’s old chalkboard? I’m sure they don’t have anything of use, and I don’t feel like drawing in the dirt to get my point across.”

  Kemper smiled, it was just a millimeter lift, but it still illuminated my childhood friend’s face. There was hope and relief reflected in his eyes. I didn’t realize how much my cooperation affected him. “I’ll see what I can do.”

  The Scavenger Chief was chatty during our walk. I was still exhausted from working all day, so I pretended to listen as he described the various plants surrounding us. As his words went in one ear and out the other, I couldn’t help but observe how completely in his element he was. I also made sure to take very rigorous mental notes about my surroundings. I didn’t want these afternoon walks with him to become a habit. I was more than capable of walking alone, thank you very much.

  “Nikketa once told me that a wise man should recognize when he is boring his audience,” he said while bumping my shoulder. I scowled as the contact jarred me out of my thoughts.

  “Can you please keep your body to yourself?” I replied, taking larger strides. I was eager to get out of the woods and get this lesson over with so I could sleep. Despite the open space, it felt like Tallis and his half-smile was taking up all the room. It felt claustrophobic.

  “The way those eyes of yours were roaming over me yesterday, say the contrary,” Tallis replied with a smirk. He bit his lip while trailing his gaze down my body. I frowned and huffed out in frustration.

  “You know, my mother once told me never to assume things. I can assure you that my eyes only looked at you with disgust.” I squinted at him.

  Tallis gave me a knowing grin that made me feel like his perfect crystal-blue eyes were undressing me. He slowed his steps and leaned towards me. After a moment, he said in a soft voice, “Your breath caught when we touched, and I noticed a flush in your cheeks that had nothing to do with our brisk walk.”

  I made a conscious effort to control my breathing. I wanted to prevent that same reaction from reaching the surface. I didn’t have time or patience for a Scavenger, and a cocky one at that.

  “Emotions aren’t always black and white, Agapimenos. Sometimes they’re symptoms.”

  I rolled my neck and continued to walk. “Tell me about the Chief trials,” I replied. A change of subject was necessary, and this was one I actually felt curious about. I had spent the evening on my Tablet studying the extremely primitive Scavenger elections. The brutal process intrigued me. What kind of society picked their leaders through trials and not by status or elections?

  “There isn’t much to tell. Contestants are given three tests,” Tallis began while brushing his hand against mine. I slapped it away with a frown, which made him chuckle. “The first one tests your wisdom. The elders gave us an incredibly hard riddle and thirty minutes to solve it.”

  “What was your riddle?” I asked in a giddy tone as memories of my father filled me. I loved problem-solving. As a young girl, Dad quizzed us every night at the dinner table. It was one of the few things I could beat my brothers at, and I reveled in their frustration. Dad always said I was the smart one.

  Tallis stopped walking and I stopped with him. He observed me with a smile before speaking.

  “I never was, am always to be. No one ever saw me, nor ever will, And yet I am the confidence of all, To live and breathe on this terrestrial ball. Who am I?”

  Tallis stared expectantly at me with the hint of amusement as I mumbled over the words to myself again and again. He watched the way I processed the riddle. I repeated it over and over, processing all the possible answers. Tallis licked his lips as I worked through the riddle. My response seemed important to him, for whatever reason. It felt good to flex my brain. Father always said my eyes lit up whenever he gave me a particularly challenging one. After a few more moments of deliberation I finally answered.

  “Tomorrow.”

  Tallis smiled. It was a breathtaking display of pleasure and, despite his sharpened teeth, I couldn’t help but notice how handsome the expression made him. Impressing Scavengers wasn’t something I normally did, but his approval felt different.

  “Perfect. You’re definitely a smart one Agapimenos.” The nickname didn’t bother me as much this time as I continued walking towards camp.

  “When I was a little girl, my father gave us riddles,” I said wistfully, surprised by the words coming out of my mouth. It had been a while since I spoke of Dad’s little ‘brain tests’ as he’d call them. I let go a shallow sigh as my eyes shimmered with unshed tears. I missed him.

  “Oh, so you’ve had practice then? Maybe I should find a harder riddle for you to solve,” Tallis suggested while puffing out his chest.

  “I like a challenge,” I replied.

  “So do I.”

  Tallis’ words felt suggestive, and I felt his eyes on me again. The hint of desire forced me to imagine all the meanings buried deep within his statement.

  “Liking a challenge and rising to the challenge are two completely different things, Scavenger.”

  “I think you’ll find that I always rise to the challenge, Agapimenos.”

  I swallowed down lust and looked Tallis over with new eyes. He might be a Scavenger, but he was all man. A man with muscles and a flirty smile that made my stomach clench.

  “What were the other two trials?” I coughed out. I wanted to move closer and needed to put space between us. Flirting with Tallis was like breathing; it just happened regardless of whether I was thinking of it or not. I needed to end it. Now. Normally, I liked a gentleman that was upfront with his intentions, but Tallis was no gentleman.

  “I’ll tell you another day,” Tallis replied with a faraway expression as he tied up his long white hair.

  “Fine,” I grumbled as we made our way to camp. Once there, I was surprised with a large group of adults and children waiting for me around a campfire.

  “Word traveled that you’re going to teach. We have a lot of people wanting to learn,” Tallis explained, and a sliver of nervousness hit me. I knew I had the intelligence to teach them, but a room full of Scavengers still had me on edge.

  I coughed and rolled my shoulders back, giving off what I hoped was a confident impression. “Alright students. Let's get started, shall we?”

  Everyone went eerily silent as I asked a series of questions to gauge their education level. Although there was a wide variety of skill levels, most of the Scavengers had a basic education. I then split Scavengers up into different groups based on their current abilities. After that, I assigned some of the higher leveled individuals to those that had no prior education. It was a little rocky at first. Some of the men and women gave me rude looks, while others ignored me. I guess prejudice between our people went both ways.

  Gordon wore a blinding smile as I stuttered through instructions, making everything almost worth it. He still wasn’t wearing his prosthetic leg, but he seemed happier today than the last time I saw him. In the sun, his pale skin and baggy eyes were more pronounced. The clothes he wore were too big, showing off his skinny frame. It looked like he rarely saw sunlight. After getting a group of younger children to trace their letters in the dirt, I spoke to him.

  “Gordon, I thought we agreed that you would try wearing the leg.” I crossed my arms over my chest, raising a scrutinizing brow. He might have taken a metaphorical step in the right direction by coming today, but that wasn’t enough.

  “I—I tried to wear it, but it hurt and rubbed against my skin. I don’t think it fits correctly,” he explained, and I felt a semblance of relief.

  “Oh, well that should be an easy fix. Let's go visit Maverick at the clinic. I’m sure he can readjust it so it's more comfortable for you. I have the day off for Pioneer Day tomorrow. Have Tallis walk you to town, and I’ll bring you to Mav.” I’d been looking for an excus
e to avoid Pioneer Day and was happy that a solution had presented itself.

  “Wow, thank you,” Gordon said while scratching the back of his neck, leaning more on his crutch.

  “Don’t cry over it. I need your help teaching some of the younger kids. They're helpless. I don’t need you wasting time by hobbling around,” I replied with a dismissing wave of my hand.

  Gordon laughed, and his face morphed into something that almost showed how young he actually was. Usually, he was so mad that it was hard to tell, yet at this moment, he was beautifully carefree.

  “Whatever you say, Miss Black!” Gordon threw me a two-fingered salute before shuffling over to a group of adults who were discussing an equation. Once I tore my eyes from Gordon’s excited chatter, I noticed Tallis observing me while tilting his head to the side. When our eyes met, I felt stripped bare. With bright eyes, he skimmed the tips of his fingers across his jawline before walking towards me.

  “My people seem happy,” he said while surveying the space with a pleased grin. Gordon broke out into a loud bark of a laughter while Nikketa tickled his side.

  “Can you bring Gordon to town tomorrow? Maverick needs to make some adjustments to the leg.” Hoping I sounded nonchalant, I adjusted my dress. The material had sunk lower on my chest.

  “You just want to see me again,” Tallis joked. I wanted to dismiss his flirtatiousness, but I felt too lighthearted and invigorated from teaching to care. I wondered if this is how Mom felt at the end of every day. Happy. Fulfilled. I bumped Tallis’ shoulder while grinning at everyone.

  While biting his lip, he leaned over. His lips so close, I could feel their softness on my neck. He then whispered, “I thought we were keeping our bodies to ourselves,” before walking off.

  Chapter Five

  I woke up the next morning and it hurt to move. My eyes were heavy with sleep. When I rolled my neck, my bones cracked, and loud pops echoed throughout the tiny room. Yesterday was exhausting. God, was this what it felt like to work? If so, count me out.